alls fair in love and war.
In my best 'love me' pose...
I can't even blame things on my 'deceitful heart' becuase I have a new heart. I am a new creation. And yet the heart I do have just doesn't seem to beat in the right way.
It's not that I've been left high and dry with noone to pay attention to me. Believe me if I were a pussy cat I could be purring all the way to heaven over this year. And I have met some really special people. But yet...Frighteningly, at the age of 21 I am allowing the little phrase 'left on the shelf' to creep in to my mind. Pure ridiculous, of course.
Maybe it's becuase I did meet someone this summer. Someone that surprised me and got me imagining myself walking down the aisle. Maybe that was the problem, just a little too eager. Not desperate, eager. Honest. An 'exceptional young man'-in my father's words. Yes I agree. Quite. But he's confused me and well I don't really quite know what happened between Serbia, Berlin and now. It's all a complicated story and would make a great soap opera episode...ie, complicated but stupidly boring. So I won't bother. But ah well.
The journey continues and I'm waging war not on singlness but on discontentment and having the wrong owners wanting to make me purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. (Don't think about that anaology too much. not good.)
posted by becci brown @ 8:49 pm
3 comments
3 Comments:
err..sorry to make contact on your blog but I didn't have your e-mail address. Can you get in touch with
me re: UCCF media team? My e-mail is pb@uccf.org.uk - cheers Pod
Never been on your blog before! Got here through Richard's. Good stuff, I like it! just thought you should know that I love how passionate and honest you are about God and Goldsmiths and that even though there are know details, I absolutely understand and empathise about whatever guy situation has just gutted you. I'm only 20 and feeling on the shelf!!
Hope your term goes well
xXx
Oh and at Momentum Richard told me about the misfortune with your hair but I thought it looked really nice... kind of like mine in year 10 ... when I was in my goth stage... But I still like it, even my Mum liked my hair when it was like it so it really couldn't be that goth. Shut up Rachel! I like the hair. Catch you later x
yes, indeed we are VERY stupid. But at the same time, we are expressing the natural GOd given longing of our hearts. Juts not quite accepting God's providence aswell!!
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